hello hello! things have been great these days... last night Cam and I attended the awards ceremony at Columbia Bible College. I was awarded the John Schmidt Bursary which made me almost burst into tears (actually I did when I found out that was the one I got!) it has a special place in my heart because a couple years ago John and Erna Schmidt were my counselors. I had spent at last a year and a half talking to John about everything under the sun, he was an incredibly gifted man. God used in him incredible ways to touch my life and the lives of others all over campus. So when Cam called me months before our wedding that John had passed away, it was incredibly difficult, I couldn't even attend his funeral because I had a shift at IGA I couldn't get rid of. But I am grateful, so very grateful for his life, his influence, and now this award. It was an honor... and very fitting, I think.

I have been thinking a lot lately, (this is what I do!) and have come to the conclusion that I really just need to focus on God and not on the other things that have been flooding my mind. Cam told me the other day that Im so much like my dad because I am always paranoid... this is true! heehee... but I have been taught a lot these days. God has really influenced me in personal ways. Like the call and revelation to truly take care of myself, so... this is what I am doing. FINALLY! and Im glad to do it. Ive also decided to take a break from school after CBC is done. I have more to finish than I had thought previously, so Im looking into distance ed so that I can finish a lot more quickly. I hope to get a job in a library when Im out (fingers crossed, apparently its next to impossible to get in if you don't have a resource to get you in, but Im confident that if Im meant to get in there, God will find a way) or in a bank. This way I can gain enough hours to go on maternity leave for the first time... SO... hopefully Cam and I will be starting our family soon after CBC is done :D which is all I want at this point in time.

I hope to then consider a masters degree either with distance ed, or if I can find an appropriate course here at a university that accepts CBC graduation credits. I still have no clue what to do, but right now... after intense and serious prayer, counseling is not my absolute direction. I am going to continue to consider it, among other things. Keeping my heart, and mind open for the correct direction God wants me to go. But I believe that just cause I want to start my family sooner than later, does not mean that I won't be successful in my educational goals and career goals, whatever they end up being. Things may change though... I guess it all depends where Cam and I are after CBC is done. Im just starting to realise that the money I could make with a career after a masters degree is not as important to me as having a family, and living my life with my husband. So, whether or not we buy a home next year or the year after, or whether or not we can't make it to Cancun before our first child comes, it doesn't matter at all! Because God will take care of us, we will have each other and that's really all I want anyways! :)

so **cheers** to Godly revelations.
N Stehr.