Baby Bean is on it's way!

It's with much excitement that we announce that we're pregnant again! Due April 5th and are thrilled. This pregnancy has taken a lot of tears and time but also shown us patience, love, perseverance and faith. I am incredibly grateful. 

But it's with a cautious heart that I post our ultrasound picture. I'm fully aware this picture and announcement can be painful for some wonderful women I know experiencing the sting of infertility and frustration of a long wait for their positive pregnancy test. These women are on my heart and in my prayers. 

I can't help but remember just weeks before I got pregnant with bean, crying over a friends pregnancy announcement. I was thrilled for her but felt overwhelming grief that I should have my pumpkin (my lost May baby) in my arms. I'm not sure when that pain will go away but I remember the pain every so clearly and mourn with friends who have lost or who are struggling to concieve. This whole motherhood journey is a tough one. 

So to those woman on my FB, reading my blog posts. I'm sorry you're experiencing the grief of loss or the sting of infertility. I'm praying for you. I understand if you unfollow me, I understand if you just can't see me right now. I'm not offended. 

The reality for us this time is that it took us a miscarriage, 9 months of trying and many tears to get to this point. It wasn't easy to get pregnant this time. I believe it's happened at the right time but that didn't make the journey any less painful.

So with my joyful announcement I am grateful for the love, the congrats, the support, the prayers and ask that you pray for baby beans health. Because like I said to Cam last night, "I can try my hardest to disassociate myself from this life "just in case" but no matter what happens I'm this baby's mother. Now, today and for eternity and I'm madly in love." 

I'm beyond grateful, I fall to my knees in thankfulness because I believe it's only by Gods grace that I get to experience the joy of this life. My rainbow baby. 

N.