i am so stressed right now that i cant even stand it... i hate my new manager, i really really hate what shes doing to the place, to the store, to everyone i work with. i cant even express how pissed i am right now at her. ba!
i used to love my job, if you ever talked to be before this week about my job i used to always say how much i loved it and how much fun it was... now... you wont hear that. im looking for something new, or im going to complain enough to get me transfered to the langely powercenter or guildford, cause honestly right now, i am dreading my shift tomorrow... my stomach is hurting, thats how stressed i am about this now.
AHHHH!!! why did this have to happen? why!? ba!.... yes, thats what i say when i cant express things. BA, BA BA!

okay...

i need to spend more time with God, i feel like i cant even look at myself in the mirror, thats how much i regret the way my relaitonship with God is at the moment, i feel as though its not there at all. i feel as though i am alone, and done so much on my own that he doesnt even want me anymore (this i know isnt true) i want so badly to be back in the arms of God, and i really think that after i type what it is i will type here, that i will end up crying.... the tears are already streaming. and i hope, i really hope that in the midst of my tears God will meet me here and hold me. i really want to be held by someone that loves me... i really want the words from God to say that everything is going to be okay, hes taking care of it.
i believe that he can... the question is why would he want to? after all the time ive spent ignoring him, not allowing myself to believe that he is listening or wants to hold me.... so, excuse me as i lay everything at his feet and beg for forgiveness.... because
Jesus Loves Me! The Bible Tells Me So.... and i truly will believe that deep down for the rest of my life.

Good night!