so its been a bit since Ive posted... and honestly there really is not much for me to say, other than I just spend a lovely time with Lauren Neufeld, my England friend who is home here in Canada to get married before she returns to England. So my dearest friend who I know reads this blog... thanks a bunch for the wonderful time tonight, especially the wedding talk was delightful! :)
I went to the doctor on Monday, I told her my fears concerning the treatment she has put me on, and now I have to make a decision whether I go for another "dose" on Thursday. She said she wants me to keep going on it... that its only for a short time, she would never put me on it long term, etc... but once again. Im scared. Im totally, 100%, completely scared. So please pray for me and my fear. That God will lead me to the right decision, and that God brings both me and Cam strength to get through whatever there is on the way in terms with all of this. My hope is high and I am doing really good, honestly. Im in pain off and on, Im just generally uncomfortable on a daily basis so just please pray for me in that regards too! Praise the Lord that Endo doesn't turn into cancer (only VERY rare cases) and is not life threatening. Its just really painful, thats all!
As well, Im being referred to the top Endometriosis doctor in all of BC. So please say many prayers for me, that the referral will not take very long at all, and that the doctor and I (who I hear is fantastic) will find the Endo if it's in me somewhere and make me all better. It could be a 6 month wait I heard, which is exhausting and emotional for me to hear, so a quicker referral will be amazing. My Dr said we're skipping the middle man and running straight to the top with this referral, she usually doesn't do this but she said she is going to make an exception for me! (thank you Jesus!)

My engagement and wedding planning have been SO magical, I thank everyone for the cards, love, encouragement, hugs, and joy expressed. Its been the most wonderful time for me... I am amazed at how happy everyone is for us! I am extatic myself (of course!) and very excited to get all my planning done. Everything is so surreal. We are having our wedding at Columbia Bible College for all who don't know, we met there, fell in love there, so its PERFECT! We're even getting Gerald to make his famous Turkey dinner with all the trimmings. I have my decor and photographer booked! and this week we're working on getting some invitation ideas, then its registry once we're out of school, along with honeymoon booking and finding a florist. I feel like Im ontop of everything, yet I feel like Im second guessing myself as well. I have a lot of help though, so Im not worried at all.
The latest though is... do I want red in the color scheme? hmmm.... grrrrrr!!!!!!!!

As well, I decided Im going to call Cam my fiance every and any chance I get for the next Nine months and three weeks :)

Blessings!

O... and yes, Ive been trying to get a decent picture of my ring to show you here online, unfortunately as Nantina said "the photos don't do justice" and you'll just have to wait to track me down, take my left hand and peek yourself. Here is another cute pic of me when I tried a photo shoot with my new "bling" Once again you can't exactly see the beauty of it... but it really is all its cracked up to be!!!

Trouble arrives in measures, and we stack it up real high, until we're convinced, we have no reason to try. If you feel defeated, you're absolutely wrong, for if you follow your dream, you could never lose for long. Ignore the minor set-backs that pile up and trouble you,
or you will build a mountain, out of the stones hurled at you. The future holds great promise, your destiny unknown, but God is always helping, and you're never alone. Soar bravely toward your goal. Let nothing darken the way. You can change your tomorrow,
if you seek your dream today.
posted by Candy15

I have joined an Endometriosis support site which has helped me more than I can express in regards to understanding more about the disease and the people who experience it. Especially with all the different ways that people get pain, the information sites aren't exaggerating when they say that it is different for everyone. It truly is, but that is nothing but comforting because I have read some truly heart breaking testimonies. I continue to be as positive as possible, its easier some days, and actually its a lot easier just in general than it had been before. As well, God has blessed me with such supportive friends, family and well, my most supportive fiance, who even though he has no idea what to say or do to help, tries his best anyways. Yet, I appreciate my friend Kortney Story the most, who has encouraged me again and again that "its really not that bad, it could be worse" and she is right!!! Its do-able and thats the most important thing to keep in mind. Even through the physically painful experiences.
I have another doctors appointment on Monday for a referral to a specialist which I will hopefully see in April or May when Im out of school. Please pray that the referral goes smoothly and quickly so that I can get on the right track and in a more functioning capacity soon. The fatigue and headaches/body aches, cramping are overwhelming a lot of the time and interfere with my studies, daily life and mostly sleep. Which is obviously not good. Im so thankful to be able to take a year off this next school year to take care of my self and save up for my new life as Mrs. Stehr.

The poem above is inspirational to me, and the picture is one that was taken at my roommate, Traci's birthday at the Old Spaghetti factory. The night that some random waitress of ours flirted with Cam all night long! (she even touched his arm!) I laughed my little heart out... I've got the ring, so Im not concerned.

love and blessings to all!

so as we headed out from my parents place, it was at least 10:30pm and we were both ready for some down time. Its exhausting celebrating our big day! and cam had done so much driving that night, he was so tired. However, once we got back to our apartments we decided to "play it stupid" with both of us coming in as though nothing happened. I even had my sweater over the ring. Yet, I think it was my grinning face that gave it away because no one was fooled and the screaming/crying began. What a wonderful bunch of friends/family/community we have here in our two apartments. It was then that people started talking about going out "we have to go and celebrate!". YAY! more celebrating! so... Boston Pizza was the choice (even though Im not too fond of the place) it was about 11:30 or so by the time we got there.
Cam and I were too full from dinner so we just got a mudslide to share (SO GOOD!) and everyone else got drinks and some appies. But the most fun part was that Dave mentioned to the waiter that we were celebrating our engagement. So the guy said "O is that right? we have got to do something then!" so at the end of the night they gave us all our drinks on the house because of our engagement! it was amazing!
That night I went home, with a constant gaze on my ring... and couldn't believe the amazing day I just had and the blessings that were given to me. The family and love that surrounded me that day. It was PERFECT!
IM ENGAGED! yippppeeeeeeeeee.... **Heehee**

Blessings :)

SO! here is the long awaited Engagement post for those who are reading. So as you know from my previous post, Cam and I couldn't do a Valentines date on the 14th because Cam has youth that night, but he surprised me with the stuffed lion and chocolates and all, such a sweetheart. So he said "on Saturday Im going to take you to Cascade Falls in Mission" I was sort of suspicious but then didn't want to keep my hopes up so I talked myself out of thinking he was going to pop the question (at least I tried). So on Saturday Cam came into my apartment and I asked whether or not I needed "hiking shoes" or just the new cute flats I had been wearing, he said those were fine and we headed off. Yet, as we climbed the "mountain" more and more snow presented itself and I was a little nervous for frozen feet for our little "hike". Sure enough we get there and there was TONZ of snow, so Cam gave me his socks to wear in my flats. It was super sweet of him.
we got the falls and there was another couple there. So, Cam and I enjoyed the view and he waited until the couple left. As soon as they did (like ten minutes) Cam started mentioning that its our two year anniversary soon (the 24th), he asked what I saw us doing the rest of this year together and we mentioned things like growing together and such, growing closer spiritually and all. Yet every time he brought these things up, it got me wondering why we weren't going back down to the car yet, and why he seemed to be so nervous. I was like "is this happening?" After I while I figured it must be! So when he said "I love you" I would look up expecting that at that very moment a ring would appear and after about three or four of these "I love yous" Cam went into a speech about how much he loves me, wants to spend his life with me, take care of me, etc... it was SO SWEET! and wonderful. He pulled out the ring box, opened it up, got down on one knee and said "will you marry me?" I of course freaked out!!! put my hands up to my face, almost cried, but was too excited to cry! I said YES! Then I pulled him back to his feet and gave him the biggest hug and kiss EVER! it was so much fun, we talked all about his plans and nervousness... it was so surreal.
The next moment we were racing down the trail, into the car (we were both freeeezing and my feet were too cold and really sore) we headed off to his parents place (it was their anniversary yesterday so we got engaged on their anniversary! this was a coincidence cause it slipped Cams mind) then we headed off to my parents place who took us out for a great dinner celebration at White Spot, back to their place for a toast with sparkling apple juice and then back to Abbotsford. There we had people waiting for us to see whether or not Cam had asked THE question. I showed the "bling" and I had people coming towards me who crawled over other people and couches! It was such a screaming fest, and hugging/crying fest! we went out for Boston Pizza and got drinks at Midnight, we weren't home until after 2am and Im exhausted still.

Thats the wonderful story and my super amazing engagement day! so magical, wonderful and so Cam. The way he did everything was completely his personality and his thought and love, thats what made it so special. He even picked the ring out all on his own, and he did a GOOD job! such elegance and thought and of course love!

so the date you ask?!
December 20th, 2008

People seem surprised when told, but I really wanted a winter wedding and it works best for our schedules and lives. Im thrilled! Its going to be here at Columbia Bible College because this is the place we met, and fell in love... the place we have grown together and have experienced practically all of our relationship so it just seems to fit perfectly!

If I missed out on any details I will fill in more! THANK YOU ALL who have wished us a congrats... it means SO MUCH to me!

Blessings!

IM ENGAGED!!!! yay!!!! just you wait, details and more pictures are coming. BUT I wanted to leave you with this one. The ring is gorgeous! I love it so much! And know that the way he did it was SO SWEET! and wonderful! BEST DAY OF MY LIFE!!!!

ITS VALENTINES DAY!!!! and Cam went ALL OUT this year for me. No seriously, last year he was amazing and bought me flowers along with my favorite Ben N' Jerrys icecream, this year. Well... just take a look at the picture SUPER sweet huh!? I woke up and after getting ready for the day, couldn't wait to walk around the apartment snooping to see if he did anything cute. Nothing in the apartment itself, until I peeped through the peep hole and saw a glimpse of something pink outside our front door. I quickly opened up the door and on a stool sat my lion, 3 lindor chocolate bars and the sweetest, most mushy romantic card. I got all giddy that I came into my bedroom, and said "AMBER! (she was asleep so I woke her up in a frenzy) LOOK WHAT CAM GOT ME!" she smiled said "O Nicole" and went back to sleep. I frantically got ready for work, headed off to the cafeteria and proceeded to tell everyone I knew of my sweet boyfriend and the super cute pink lion he left on my front door this morning.
I don't think I'll share what I got him, you'll have to ask him yourself! But I promise its good! ;) Unfortunately we wont' be able to celebrate our Valentines day together tonight, Cam has youth which is apart of his internship with Bakerview and its too important for him to ask to miss. Plus, Im really happy and excited for him that he is doing so well there! Thanks Tim for keeping him happy! They are going go-carting and well, thats pretty exciting anyways! SO Cam mentioned he is taking me to this water fall in Mission on Saturday! Its going to be our "valentines date" and Im very very excited. I'll post about it when we're back that night! As well, my roommates and I are doing our own VALENTINES DAY EXTRAVAGANZA! with fondue and the works! Thats going to be a hoot as well, my weekend is going to be AMAZING! so.. HAPPY VALENTINES DAY TO ALL! I hope that you're all being spoiled and loved like you should be.

Blessings!

I absolutely love that this time around people I know are going through the same predicament as me. Its wonderful to be able to talk to two of my friends and have them say "I know what you mean, I was there too!" Its like WHAT! REALLY!? o my goodness, SOMEONE knows, someone has gone through this, someone has gotten THROUGH this. And really, its not THAT bad.

My outlook has done a 360 degree turn, and that has all come from the grace of God and the many loved ones who have prayed a prayer for me. I appreciate how my family, friends and Cam have willingly listened to my complaints and frustrations, my negative outlook that I first held so strongly too. But today, Im doing great! And I am choosing to be positive through whatever it is that comes my way! Even if its surgery. No more fear for whatever it is that this possible Endo is going to throw my way.

I wanted to say as well... that those who have been praying for me, please also, say a long and heartfelt prayer for my friends little nephew Noah Jonathan Neufeld. This handsome little guy was diagnosed with Trisomy 13 while still in his mothers womb back in/around October, he was born last Friday and has beaten so many odds, but is still not in the clear yet. There is a slim chance, given by the doctors, that he will live to his 1st birthday. I ask that you pray for him and his family.

if you want to visit their blog, click on right hand side of my blog page, entitled NEUFELD FAMILY and leave a sweet comment of love and encouragement.

Praise God for the blessings he's given us, no matter how small or short.

more lovely flowers to smile for!

these past couple of days have been difficult pain wise, but i feel that i finally have a hold on to my emotions and my life. i finally feel like this isn't going to end me, im not going to let it run my life. i mean i don't have the "concrete" diagnosis, but it sure feels real, and even in the midst of it feeling real. this "real" disease is not going to over take my entire being. i can't let it.

i found another great web site! i really love the encouragement in it. and it gives guide lines to a certain Endometriosis diet to possibly relieve pain and symptoms. i feel as though i should do it... actually i know i should. so i will! starting tomorrow.

here is the site!

blessings!

"The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:5-7

ive been doing a lot of thinking lately. a lot of contemplating how i feel and what i want to do with all of this. for some reason i keep trying to stay away from talking to God. maybe i feel that the pain im experiencing will only grow if i come to be "emotional" before God. ive had people tell me that satan is using this to keep me distracted from God, i have people tell me that God doesn't want me to be sick and i need to focus in on that fact and stop being where i am. yet the truth is that today and yesterday ive had such horrible pain that its not easy to forget that this is whats going on in my life. and when i do come to God about it i wish to scream on the top of my lungs that "this is not what i want for myself, this is not the future, or the life that ive asked for. and for goodness sake make this all go away already".

i feel like im becoming over dramatic, like a broken record that keeps spinning, and i realise that there are tonz of other people that are worse off then me. i praise God for what i have and the blessings given to me.

i am starting to realise that my worries aren't going to change the diagnosis when it becomes concrete and the only thing i can do is fall at the feet of my Lord and pray for healing, courage, strength and comfort. this is one long journey i never asked for, this is one diagnosis i am piss afraid to receive, this means not knowing what the future brings, not knowing how intense it all is, not knowing whats going on inside of me... but its something that can be used to bring me closer to God, to glorify God, to bring me to lean on Him more. and that can't be anything but good.

hahaha... im too emotional, and i over analyize everything, i worry far beyond what anyone should and i take life very personally. maybe a lot of learning and growing can come from all of this, which always takes a little bit of pain first.

Blessings.

ITS LENT!!!! yay!!!! SO... I'm going to give up Facebook. I'm a little too addictive to it, so giving it up is going to be really good for me. SO... please email me instead if you need to get in touch with me at:

peanutbutter.please@gmail.com

OR

give me a call on my cell, if you don't have the number I'll send it to you in an email if you email me to ask for it

However, you get to do whatever you give up for Lent on Sundays (so Ive been told) so every once in a while on a Sunday I'll check it. But I won't stay on for very long.

what are YOU giving up for Lent?

Blessings!

i added this picture because flowers always make me feel better, they make me smile and so i felt like i should share in my desire to smile today!

in the past couple of days ive read everything that i can get a handle on when it comes to endometriosis, i think im irritating my room mates, even Cam and my family cause im talking so much about it. but seriously, how could i not? i am excited that there is finally some action going on, a doctor has listened to me, its not all in my head. or is it? as i sit here, the pain is dulled, for now and my overwhelming need to sleep is still hindering me from opening up my book and doing homework. but is that just a reaction of other things? i so desperately want it to be something, anything... just diagnose me with something that makes sense! PLEASE! FOR GOODNESS SAKES! im afraid that as i read the symptoms of Endo, mine will no longer match what i read and i'll be back in Dr. Ferris' office with the dreaded "yes its IBS" once again... I HATE THAT DIAGNOSIS! it can not be that, it doesn't make any sense. the stories ive read, the surgery that may be preformed and the reality that something is indeed wrong, i mean it has to be... right? its all so, whats the word? mind boggling.

so my prayer request, honest, and to the very depth of my heart... is that i get in to see the gynecologist soon, very very very soon. So that my treatment can start as soon as possible, if Endo is really the culprit of all of this.

but what if its not? please God, let the answers come soon.
i surrender myself into Your hands. Amen.

I had another doctors appointment yesterday and let me tell you its been the BEST so far! I have been referred to a gynecologist and I'm thrilled. The suspicious culprit of all my misery in the last four and a half years is NOT Irritable Bowel Syndrome BUT

ENDOMETRIOSIS

here is a good link if you want to read up on it: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Endometriosis

I won't go into details with what they're doing to treat me. I'd rather not tell the world and keep that to myself, Cam (and family) until things start to move along with the gynecologist (that won't be for three months). My doctor can not say 100% that its Endo, only my gynecologist can, so the diagnosis is not concrete as of yet.

Thank you all who have prayed for my health these past four years. I FINALLY know whats going on, all of my symptoms and pain are suspected to come from this one problem.
However, prayer is still needed as I embark on my new healing adventure which may involve surgery.

PRAISE THE LORD, and may He be glorified!!

Blessings.

Today there were schools that came in to talk to students (especially third and fourth year students, which I am) about their Masters programs. I'm not sure if its a secret that one of my greatest wants out of life is to complete a masters degree in psychology and counseling. I can't think of anything other than marrying, being a mother and accomplishing a Masters... for my life. Seriously. I mean of course God is the number one in my life, there is nothing close to comparing to that. All I am stating is that the desire to hold in my hand a degree and educate myself is one of the passions I never dreamed to have. Especially not for psychology. The photo above is my Introductory to Psychology 1&2 text book. It is this class, and this book where my joy lies as I pull it out and read for tests and papers. Now experiencing more psych classes this semester, what I have learned from that book I am practicing and understanding even more in specific and narrow ways.
What I'm getting at is... I can't see myself doing anything else. Like I can't picture myself being NOTHING else then a counselor and masters degree student. Nothing else other than a mother. There is no way that I will put off having children, I want them more than the passion I have for a degree. But I can't see myself waking up to any other joy (in the working department) than counseling, or being a health psychologist.

But honestly.. I am scared SHITLESS! and yes, I am sorry I swore, but I swear its the truth. And today made me aware of these two facts. Super, totally, 100% SCARED! but super, totally, 100% sure.
And even more sure that I'll need ALL of Gods strength to be the best counselor I can be! Because I sure as heck ain't going to be able to do it on my own.
And that is another BIG reality that I have come to today! Today has been a good day!

Blessings!

This was our first ever photo together in February 2006, a couple weeks before we were "officially dating". Although everyone knew it would happen eventually... So now, on the 24th of this February, Cam and I will be celebrating our TWO year anniversary! I wonder where the time has gone?! Its amazing that when I came here to CBC, and walked up into that student lounge for the first time it would bring me to look forward to one of my most favorite days of the year! It took that one "hello" to get me hooked on him, and I can replay the way he sat, what he was doing, and how I felt in that moment we met for the first time. Kinda corny right? Well... not so much in my eyes. Every single day I praise God for the blessing of Cam, he has held my hand through so much that has happened in these past two years. There is no one else on earth who is better for me. I swear it! I fall in love with him more every single day, so I am excited for the day when we're both old and wrinkled, holding hands as we walk around the nearest park, admiring each other, Gods creation and the way our lives treated us. Yep, one of these days! :) This post has no real significance, other then my boasting of my most wonderful boyfriend!

Gods blessings!!

so... I went home this past friday night because my family was celebrating my moms birthday by going out for a nice dinner (mmm... chinese food) and a movie (the bucket list was good!) but while I was home my mom and I had a good discussion. After asking me how Ive been, with the diet specifically and all, I answered "all right, I just can't seem to shake off the feeling that Im not doing the best I can" well, her response was more than brilliant, "Nicole, you keep thinking that you're going to wake up one day without any cravings or without it being difficult, this is something you're going to have to deal with every day. Asking the Lord for his strength to do your very best that day to eat the best way you can for your health. Its not going to be easy, until you accept and recognise this, you'll more than likly continue to have problems and struggles but each day is going to be different, and thats okay!" WOW! brilliant huh? So.. this is where I am today, and where I intend to stay and go forward from. She's right, there isn't going to be the day when I wake up and go "hey! no cravings, this is super simple, horray for me!" hahahah.. thats unlikly, but I can wake up and say "Father God, I give this day to you and I ask for your strength to say no to the foods I need to say no to and achieve the health that I need to achieve, I ask that you be glorified through this experience and that you level the hormonal imbalance in my body, in your glorious name, AMEN!"

Blessings! :)

It is amazing to me how powerful nausea can be and how devastating it can also be to myself and the wonderful "health streak" I had been on for almost two full weeks. I know that its "early in the game" but one fallen step back to me feels like a dancing game and failure that I wish NOT to experience. I was given pills to help my stomach pain and sure enough, they make me nauseous, severely so that I need some sort of solid carbohydrate to stop and settle it. NOT so much fun when that is exactly what I am hoping to stay away from, and what from time to time causes pain and discomfort. But the major problem here is the little bit of "luxury" in carbs that causes the want for more. And finally brings me to loose sight of the true intentions of why I was doing this in the first place.
My first little hump, and Im sure there will be more. Complete health can not come in the first two weeks of a restrictive diet that offers healing. This will take time, and although I am rushing through what feels like the rushing current that is before me, reality is that steps back are inevitable. I need to realize this and be alright with it. I can not rationalize, but prepare for the hard roads and times that there are before me.
Maybe restaurants aren't for me right now, but that doesn't mean they won't be in a few weeks, months, next year. The time will come when I can sit down, order a burger and fries, enjoy and not be guilty, not have pain, not be sad with my choice, and not sorrow over an increasing health issue.
Instead the time will come when my favorite meal can be my favorite again, and not every day, but once a week maybe... and I will be okay because I will be glad that I took the time and the effort and used Gods strength to get me back to the point of being able to say "yes! I would like to order" and not be afraid of it.

Joy is in the air!, at least around me it is!
Blessings

Everything is starting to feel just a little bit overwhelming at the moment. I have my diet to be concerned about, the pills and fibre supplements that I need to make sure Im taking when Im supposed to take them. Seriously, its not easy! Then I have homework, and lets just say Ive stupidly decided to take two of the hardest classes in the same semester! (NOT a good idea), but doo-able, (hopefully!). Also, I'am working in the cafeteria again, no food card means, no food, so I need to make money so that I can go and fee myself! grrrr.... but honestly, what I think Ive just come to realize, right now, as I write this... is that its all okay, I can do it! I can make changes and experience life the way I choose to experience it. I don't need to be stressed or worried, or overwhelmed if I don't choose to be. I can just say "Im going to do my best, be my best and overcome all the obstacles that are before me!" I don't need to be little Miss. Worry! I just need to be rested in the love of Christ, family and friends. There is no need to freak out, I need to remember that life carries on, and I can do my best to succeed where I need to, but when it all comes down to it, I can't loose myself in the chaos of it all.

Blessings!

Its really incredible to me how psyched I am to accomplish what is before me. Here I have potentially been told the wrong thing these past four and a half years regarding my stomach and the problems with my digestion and progressive health failure. I won't go far into these details for the results from my tests haven't found their way back to me yet... but I feel very empowered to do what I know needs to be done and to watch my body transform from sickness to health. It really is the most amazing achievement. I have been on this "plan" since January 1st and I have already seen incredible results and improvement. Nothing is impossible, and nothing is too far out of reach. Im learning about determination, self discipline and structure, goal setting, healthy living and strength.

Praise God, for if He was not the one I kept running to, Im sure I would have never been able to get through these past four years.

Blessings!

YIPPPEEEEEEEEE.... so I went to the doctors today and it was such a wonderful appointment. I went and got more blood work done and there are some other things that they are going to check, but all in all... health is on its way! I am SO EXCITED and I FINALLY know exactly what to do!

PRAISE GOD!

Blessings and a Happy New Year to all!

you know... I feel so much like the answer is there right in front of me. That I have the strength to do what I need to do in regards to eating well, and spending the time I need to spend in the word of God. Yet... at the same time there is still that part of me that holds me back. That whispers that its not going to happen. I still find it truly difficult to deal with all that goes on in me, my body feels so foreign to me. I guess thats kind of hard to understand, but its almost as if I try to do something good, that I have one answer and then all the sudden another pops up and something once again seems to be wrong.

Ive been getting bad, dizzy headaches and I kept wondering what was going on. Friends said its my eyes and to check it out. So I went to a doctor, after a month of these headaches... I couldn't deal with it anymore, it was like I needed to sleep all the time. So, more tests. As well, my doctor said that I can't get all the nutrition that my body needs if I choose to go forward in a vegetarian diet. He said that its almost impossible to get all the protein and substances that my body is obviously craving. So, he suggested that I reconsider and go back on eating lean chicken and fish. Well, fish is out of the question. The last time I ate salmon I was sick for four days. However, chicken and turkey may not be a bad idea. Go on it for a while, get my strength back in other areas, take the detox stuff and get back to normal. Then work on getting rid of the chicken/turkey allergy. I mean, Ive dealt with the stomach stuff before... I can surely do it again. I can't handle this "drunk" feeling any longer, its driving me crazy... I feel like I can't function.

Its nuts huh? One doctor tells you to do one thing, and another the opposite. One test reveals your allergic to meat, yet another could reveal that I need meat in order to function. That I could possibly have low blood sugar and low iron. BA! hahaha... so Im in limbo... again...

Please Father God, please guide me to the answer and the plan that I can follow, that is right for me to regain my health.

Blessings.