30 weeks pregnant!

How far along: 30 weeks pregnant! Let the 10 week countdown begin :)

Size of baby: butternut squash
(17 inches & 3.1 pounds)

Weight gain/loss: wahoo! No change this week, so a total gain of 13.8lbs this pregnancy. As long as I stick to a 20-25lb gain in total then I'll be a happy girl!

Maternity clothes: I REALLY want to buy something new! :) We're doing a maternity shoot in March and I want to get a new outfit for it... maybe I'll get that dress at Old Navy that I really liked!

Movement: SO much movement! This babe is active :) my belly had obvious waves going on last night at bible study

Sleep: since I have no more work stress sleep has been wonderful! Bubba likes to be most active at night so it's fun to fall asleep to the movements :)


Cravings: I've had a serious McDonalds craving for weeks now! Just might have to give in to get rid of it.

Symptoms: heartburn SUCKS! But since I'm no longer "cross-cross applesauce", squatting eye level, picking up toys, cleaning child size tables & spaces, sitting in the nap room or picking up children all day long my back/hip/sciatic aren't as sore. It's AWESOME!


Best moment of the week: saying good-bye to everyone at work, it was so hard but I felt so loved and appreciated! Thank-you :)

Happy Tuesday!
N.

good-bye work, it's been fun!

This Friday is my last day at work before Bubba is born. It's really surreal to me that I'll be at home after one and a half days left (I'm only working a half day tomorrow). WOW! It went by so fast and I'm going to miss those kids so much! I've spent so much time with them since September and now the babe inside of me needs me off my feet and healthy. So the best choice is to listen to my doctor and go off work.

I've had an overwhelming amount of support from friends, family, co-workers and parents at work. THANK-YOU! It really made me feel down right sad and depressed when I realized I couldn't work any longer due to pregnancy complications. But after a lot of encouraging words, I've been able to see that I've just got to do what needs to be done and that's growing a healthy baby! Who knew making a human would be so hard? :)

So here is my TO DO list for my days at home after Friday:

1. Go through my boxes I still have packed from our move 1 1/2 years ago!

2. Organize my kitchen cupboards so that my kitchen is much more functional and clean!

3. Go through my closet, apparently Cam insists that the mess in there is mine (yah, right!)

4. Plan out and prepare freezer meals to get Cam and I through the first weeks when Bubba arrives. This way we eat well and don't have to worry about groceries or money used to eat out. Also, clean out deep freezer.

5. Go through living room hutch and transfer ECE stuff into bins for storage.

6. Do taxes

7. Re-do our budget/spending/saving

8. Create a cleaning schedule to keep on top of the gross mess that will accumulate in here. Do a deep clean first!

9. Look for, choose, order prints and pick frames for pictures to be hung around our home... FINALLY! Also secure dates for our maternity photo shoot and newborn photo shoot.

10. Read everything Kortney passes my way in terms of labour and delivery and newborns! Watch the movie "the business of being born"

11. Register at the hospital and schedule a tour

12. Get "padsicles" ready, pack my hospital bag, shop for things I want with me at the hospital, research what I'll need for the hospital.

13. Pick out Bubba's "coming home" outfit!!!

14. Finish Bubba's room

15. Take frequent naps, rest like crazy, read, walk, spend quality time with Cam, enjoy babes movements and get a name list together!!!!

Of course I'll be taking it easy, I'll be focusing on nothing else but this baby and getting ready for the most incredible blessing of my life! So goodbye work, I'll miss you for sure but I'm ready to be home and await my baby :)

N.

29 weeks pregnant :)

How far along: 29 weeks! WOW!

Size of baby: small cabbage
(17 inches & 2.9 pounds)

Weight gain/loss: this weigh in was rough! I blame the great meal I had last night at my dads birthday dinner :) I'm up 2.2lbs this week, so total gain of 13.8lbs this pregnancy. As long as I stick to a 20-25lb gain in total then I'll be a happy girl!

Maternity clothes: still haven't bought anything new, I'm wearing my Costco sweaters more often these days though. I REALLY want to buy something new! :) I just might use my Christmas money after my appointment Thursday.

Movement: lots and lots! And very strong, I'm going to miss it once babe comes out.

Sleep: it's hit and miss these days. Last night I hardly slept, heartburn has crept back which attacks me in the middle of the night. Thank goodness I still have an ample supply of Zantac on hand :)


Cravings: everything my diabetes tells me I shouldn't be eating. NOT fun, I haven't had the greatest blood sugar numbers lately :( really nervous about that for my Thursday appointment.

Symptoms: same old same old, although heartburn and exhaustion are back. Also my hips, siatic and lower back HURT! I can't wait to get that massage that was ordered by my doctor!

Best moment of the week: when a girl at work while saying goodbye told me she wanted to hug my baby and then hugged my baby belly. I'm going to miss these kids SO much!

Happy Tuesday!
N.

Bubba's room!

Would you like to take a peek into Bubba's room?!


Bubba's room is coming together quite quickly these past few weeks. We've got the crib in so the office is now moved to the storage room (which Cam has proclaimed his "man cave") and the dresser has been painted (take a look at the pic below). Can you believe that the crib came from a garage sale that Cams parents found and repurposed? And the dresser was made by my grandfather, Cam just spruced it up!


This green was SO hard for me to commit to, it's gorgeous now that I see it done. I love it! And believe boy or girl, we can make it work with whatever else we bring into the room. We still want a glider chair that can be moved to our living room later when I'm done nursing. It would be nice to put down an area rug but it's not something essential for before Bubba's born. We'll put up shelving to store the cloth diapers (probably something from ikea) above the dresser so I can use the top as a change table.


Like our fabric choice? It sure pays to have a mother in law who sews and is willing to share her talents. I loooove this fabric! It'll be used to make bedding and curtains! I'll post again when the room is all done, put together and waiting for Bubbas arrival. I can't wait :)

We've got so much more done than we both realized. Walking through the baby store today our wish list was smaller than we thought it'd be! If you're interested in what we're looking for, here it is:

* ergo baby carrier
* woven wrap carrier
* gliding chair
* travel booster seat
* basic baby monitor
* avent bottles & accessories (my pump is an avent manual)
* bathing tub
* nursing accessories (like nursing pads, cream, etc...)
* pacifiers (Cam specifically wants some Canuck ones)
* grooming/health kit (thermometer, nail clippers, nasal aspirator, etc...)
* child proofing kit
* disposable diapers & wipes (to get us through the first few weeks)
* swaddling blankets
* receiving blankets
* burp cloths
* clothes, sleepers, onesies (3+ month sizes)
* crib sheets
* humidifier
* dishwasher infant basket (for all the little baby things that need sanitization)
* baby/infant toys
* board books
* bibs
* privacy nursing thingy
* our cloth diaper preferred brand is Tender Tushies if you feel inclined to buy us more!
* gift cards to Motherhood or other maternity stores so I can get nursing tops & bras would be AMAZING!
* ANY gift cards for baby stores like babies R us, Carter's or children's place would be accepted with much enthusiasm!

I'm sure there are more little things that'd be nice but this is our wish list. Not that we expect anything from anyone but we've had a few friends ask and so I thought I'd post it here. It's for myself too! This way I know exactly what we still need/want :)

29 weeks tomorrow!!!!
N.

Stretch marks

I don't think it would have mattered how much I psyched myself out for the daily body changes happening this pregnancy. The moment I saw that first tiny red stretch mark on my belly, I was heartbroken. I pouted, I made Cam promise me he'd still love me no matter how ugly my belly would be after Bubba exits it. I was having a moment of complete sadness, believing that I would never be confident in my body ever again. I was picturing a saggy, red marked, wrinkled mess. It freaked me out!!

Then I took a deep breath, wiped away the tears and realized that the baby growing in this belly is FAR more important than the marks made to bring him/her here. That the belly that's left after the labour process is done is one to be worn proudly, and I have the power to change it with sweat and determination.

I can say for certain that the hormones of this third trimester are impacting me in a very dramatic way! There are more tears, more emotion, less energy, much more intense physical pain and a very obvious BIG baby belly that just keeps growing (and stretching!).

My endo scars have become the source of the stretch marks, the very marks that helped Bubba come to be are stretching to accommodate his/her home. I guess it's just all apart of the process. I know it's going to be worth it, and I'm more than proud of my achievements thus far this pregnancy; keeping my weight gain in check, exercising often, working full time. I'm going to be okay, my body will still be beautiful and my belly will carry addition marks that I will choose to carry proudly! :)

N.

28 weeks pregnant, 3rd trimester... FINALLY!

How far along: 28 weeks! 3rd trimester is here!!

Size of baby: head of cauliflower (16 inches & 2.5 pounds)

Weight gain/loss: since my weeks change over on Tuesdays now I weigh in Tuesday mornings. Gained for the first time in three weeks! Up one pound, total gain of 11.6 pounds so far.

Maternity clothes: still haven't bought anything new, I'm wearing my Costco sweaters more often these days though. I REALLY want to buy something new! :)

Movement: it's definitely getting stronger and stronger as the days and weeks go by. When Bubba moves you can actually see my stomach move around which is amazing! Cam & my mom have seen it, I love watching it! Bubba also moves A LOT around 10pm, which is when I'm usually going to bed.

Sleep: getting out of bed every 2-3 hours to pee sucks and hurts :( but it's okay, I get back in bed and back to sleep quite quickly which is really nice!

Cravings: I'm probably a bit too brave with my gestational diabetes meals. I want McDonalds SO bad right now and I'm "testing" my sugar readings to see if I can get away with having a full banana at breakfast or a small bowl of ice cream after dinner :)

Symptoms: stretch marks :'( this one has been harder than I thought to cope with. I'm really terrified that my tummy with be HIDEOUS after the delivery. But I guess that is something I need to come to terms with, that I will probably look different but that it's okay. Other than that I'm still having siatic pain, hip and lower back pain and getting generally worn down. Also, REALLY emotional. I had a crying episode twice on the weekend, one in the middle of the night Saturday night for a couple hours and the other on Sunday morning and a bit at church. I'm sure that'll continue to happen! (poor Cam!). Leg cramps this morning too and swollen hands and feet are starting... Wearing my rings in my necklace now for just in case :)

Best moment of the week: going to my new maternity clinic and feeling AWESOME there! Having things sorted out that should have been taken care of and getting off thyroid pills I should have never been taking.


Happy Tuesday everyone! :)
N.

27 weeks pregnant (still)

I felt like I should update, for my own "records" but just in case you're interested too :)

Today was my very first appointment with the Community Birth Program at the Jim Pattison surgical centre with my incredible new doctor. She was great! The appointments are longer (45 minutes), more personable, I even sat on a couch and got checked on the couch rather than on a cold table. I felt taken care of, listened to and given information I was waiting for (regarding hospital registration). It was GREAT!

So a few updates:
1. I lost weight again this week (weird) that puts me back down to a total gain of 10.6lbs. Dr. Weiler told me she's going to monitor that and to STOP losing weight. That's the first time a doctor has said that so far. My weight gain has been great she said! YAY!

2. Bubba's due date changed!!! It probably should have changed back in October after my dating ultrasound in late September. When there is a discrepancy of 5 plus days between the given due date and the dating ultrasound then you're supposed to change the due date. The other clinic never changed it, my new clinic has! New due date: April 30th.

3. I'm measuring 29 weeks, even though I'm now at 27 weeks today. If I measure 3 weeks ahead at the next appointment then I'll be sent for another ultrasound (so I might see you again Leigh Ann).

4. My thyroid blood work shows that I'm hardly hypothyroid. Dr. Weiler said she would have sent me for another blood test before putting me on meds (go figure). But because I'm already on the meds, I should keep it up, so I am. She also said I'm JUST a gestational diabetic so she might not have even bothered referring me if I had been seeing her (again, go figure).

mmmm.... my diabetic chocolate collection (they're SO good!).


My sugars have been GREAT! I really don't think I'm diabetic. But oh well, if this whole process only helps me be healthier then that can't be a bad thing.

Oh, one last thing: the new clinic was horrified when I expressed to them how I was treated on the phone when I called the other clinic last Thursday. They are going to talk to someone about it and make it known to the people that matter how I felt and what happened. I feel so loved and so glad that they're taking the initiative to speak up for me! It's awesome! :)

Okay...I'm starving, time to eat...
Have a fantastic night, and I'll be updating Tuesdays from now on!
N.

Just to clarify...

I really hope that I'm not giving the impression that diabetes is horrible and the end all. Because it absolutely is not!! I do not want anyone to assume that I'm some complainer that can't deal with the reality of my situation because that's not the case either. I've always been the individual who processed best by talking and sharing, this has just been me processing.

And through this stage of accepting what's going on it's been really great to have friends and co-workers come to me with stories of their experiences with gestational diabetes. It honestly helps me to feel like I have some serious support (and I know that I do)!

So why has this process been so emotional for me? Because my family has a long history with diabetes. Especially with my moms mother, Linda Wittrien, who I loved and adored but was sick the entire time I knew her. I do not have a memory of my beloved Oma without her being morbidly obese, pricking her fingers, injecting insulin, taking a cocktail of meds, and more. What was she sick with? Well, a lot I think! But most obviously she had type 2 diabetes and heart disease, but a stroke is what actually killed her.

Unfortunately, my body seems to be quite similar to hers. I'm SO sensitive to so much and I have such a hard time processing (and accepting) what to do about it on a regular basis. Now please don't misunderstand me, I know I'm not my Oma. I try hard to not walk in her foot steps, I'm just recognizing the similarities and its troublesome at times. Telling my mom about my gestational diabetes (who watched her mom slowly die from the decisions she made) went through the same emotional process I went through regarding my diabetes diagnosis. She cried, I cried too.

But just because this is happening doesn't mean I'll get type 2 diabetes. It does NOT mean I'll go through the same experiences my grandmother did. Just because my Oma lived and died a certain way doesn't mean I will live and die the same way. She made her decisions and I'll make mine. I get to have my own life, I can't change my genetics, my sensitivities, the way my body works. BUT I can control the way I live and care for my body, especially now with Bubba taking residence inside It. I'm learning, I'm still processing, I'm trying my best. Like my incredibly wise dula said, it's just a bump along the way. And it is just that!

Thanks for the support!
N.

my baby, my body, MY choice!

I couldn't believe the experience I had today while calling the prenatal clinic I had been seeing to cancel my afternoon appointment and inform them I'm transferring my care to a different maternity clinic.

For weeks now I haven't been able to shake the thought that I should see my family practitioner and ask about my prenatal care options. I finally took the initiative and called, I saw her today and was reminded of why I liked her so much the last time I saw her. Too bad she was on vacation when I got pregnant in the summer. If she had been then I wouldn't of gone through what I did.

An earful of "why's" "come in & talk to the doctor" " we aren't releasing your information" "you're OUR patient and not theirs". There was no attempt at kindness, just rude and crude. I was stunned, shocked, hurt and very upset. Thank goodness my new clinic (who I called after in tears) said to not go in to explain myself and that it's my body and my decision and not to worry or stress. They'll work around the info they can get elsewhere without the release of my file from the other clinic. Phew!

So here I sit on my couch relaxed (finally!) when I am "supposed" to be in a prenatal appointment right now at the crazy mean clinic. I'm grateful I listened to my instincts, I'm upset that someone tried to dictate to me my right to choose who I want to care for me through the rest of my pregnancy. It's MY body, MY baby and MY right to choose.

This new clinic is all about natural birth, with only 6 doctors which include 3 midwives. I'm able to have Kortney as my very own dula still (which my doctor supports). I know this doctor well, I'll see her at every appointment (no more not knowing which doctor I'll see) and I'll still deliver at surrey memorial. She's so understanding about what I do for work and that I'll probably need some medical leave before maternity leave. We talked about my gestational diabetes and she ACTUALLY LISTENED TO ME! I'm SO glad that I'm making this switch.

So women in my position who feel like something just isn't right about your prenatal care. Take it from me, it's YOUR body, YOUR baby and YOUR choice to change care at any time without explanation.

I'm determined now more than ever to listen to MY intuitions and instincts. As the nice receptionist at the new clinic said to me over the phone, "you're going to be a mommy, it's YOUR body and YOUR choice!"

N.

27 weeks pregnant! Last week of my 2nd trimester!

How far along: 27 weeks!

Size of baby: cucumber (15 inches & 2.2 pounds)

Weight gain/loss: I guess there's a positive (among others) in having to watch what I eat. I lost 0.4lbs this week which brings me back down to a 11.6 pound gain in total so far.

Maternity clothes: I'm not sure that there's anything to update in this category. I'm getting bored with what I've got but I'm not willing to go out and buy more right now.


Movement: I can now see my belly moving around!!! It's amazing, I could watch it all day long! I hope to sit Cam down and make him experience it with me soon.

Sleep: still struggling with getting up all the time to pee (SO annoying!). Otherwise, I'm doing the same as last week.

Cravings: haha, I would love to have pizza but won't until I understand more about this diabetic stuff. I'm eating much more fruit, veggies and cut way back on carbs so cravings aren't so overwhelming anymore and I don't need Zantac anymore either. No more heart burn!

Symptoms: the most frequent one that's bothering me the most is my hip and siatic pain. Im hoping that a belly band and my new ordered exercise will help it.


Best moment of the week: ummm... the doctor who broke the news of my gestational diabetes and hypo thyroid was SUPER sweet and I've decided to take the positive from it all. So it could have been a bad moment for me, but it really wasn't. This Friday I get to go to the class and learn what to do. I'm starting to see how much this will help me. That makes me really grateful.

Happy Wednesday everyone! :)
N.

gestational diabetes & my darn thyroid!

Well... It's true, I do indeed have gestational diabetes and hypothyroidism. What this means is that I have a thyroid not producing enough hormones which is slowing down my metabolism and contributing to my exhaustion and constipation. Only this is VERY mild and not worrisome, they just want to get control of it now. And it means that my sugars are JUST high enough to be considered gestational diabetes. The level they send patients to the diabetes clinic is 5.1 and my sugars read at 5.3 on one of my three test times (right when I got there before the sugar drink consumption).

SO! I've been given a prescription that's been filled, one pill a day for my thyroid. Which in fact should give me back my energy and ability to poop HALLELUJAH!!!!! And I've been referred to the diabetes clinic for a class to learn the in's & out's of gestational diabetes, the do's & do not's and how to take my sugar readings daily. Yes, I'll get to do the finger prick every day (woot woot!!). But NO insulin injections (can I get another HALLELUJAH??).

Yesterday I was definitely emotional in regards to going in today to learn the truth of what my tests came back with. But in all honesty, I'm not surprised. My body has always been sensitive and I haven chosen today to look at only the positive. It could have been WAY worse (it wasn't), I could have gotten a shitty doc telling me the news (I didn't, I got a dream doctor), it could have been the scariest moment of my pregnancy and it definitely was not.

I've decided to take this opportunity to kick ass even more in improving my health and make it a complete lifestyle change to better myself and my baby Bubba! Don't you worry, I do NOT eat crap all day (ask Camy) but I can always do better and this has been a serious wake up call for that.

So THANK-YOU! To all my wonderful friends and family who have texted me encouraging words, prayed for my health and supported me through this entire pregnancy thus far! Bubba and I are fabulous and will continue to be fabulous. I just might be poked more with needles than I had once thought, but no bigs!

I guess my chocolate consumption will turn to fruit consumption. Anyone got any great diabetes recipes for me???

Lots of love!
N & Bubba :)

before I know it I'll be "mommy" & not "Teacher Nicole" for most of my days

As I met with my regional director yesterday and talked about my maternity leave I realized that soon I'll be home and not at Prospect anymore. There will be a new teacher and I'll just be a memory to the 20 something children I love and adore at the centre.

I haven't given it much thought until now that I'll be replaced and probably won't be coming back to that particular placement. Instead I'll be at home getting bigger, growing Bubba inside until he/she is ready... waiting for labour to begin. Then everything will be different and instead of being responsible for the care of twenty five children forty hours a week, I'll be responsible for one child 24 hours a day, 7 days a week 365 days a year!!

But I'm nervous in a variety of ways, I'm quite sure that my schooling and ECE experience will influence my parenting. I'm sure that I'll be the mom putting out sensory tables in our house, reading books constantly, stocking up the free art corner daily and encouraging my child to "try" at many many developmentally appropriate tasks they are more than capable of doing before I step in. I'll be the mom that holds her child "too much" in the eyes of others because I believe in it. I'll be the mom who has her three year old in a car seat and breast feeds exclusively until at least a year! My experiences at work have allowed me a lot of time to build my philosophies of how children can be treated and taught to be a successful individual.

But then again I don't want my new title of "mommy" to influence my work and my identity of "teacher". I see too often that teachers get sucked into the adorable eyes of a 2 1/2 year old who proclaims that they just can't put their slippers on their feet (when they just did it for me a hour prior!). These teachers are usually moms who see their children in the eyes of the children at the centre and feel the need to "save" them from everything. Unfortunately "saving" them often debilitates them from learning the various life skills necessary to be successful in kindergarten, in ever day life. When a child learns to manipulate another to do what they want then they learn they never need to do anything for themselves. They won't learn to experience discomfort, frustration, conflict and successfully find a way to deal with it. I'm sure my strong beliefs in my work will not be hindered by my new role as a mom but I can't help but be a little nervous.

Okay, time to get ready for work. I'm closing the centre today. I'm really going to miss these kids when I'm gone :'(
N.

26 weeks pregnant!!

How far along: 26 weeks!

Size of baby: eggplant (9 inches & 2 pounds)

Weight gain/loss: up a little this week, that means a total gain of 12 pounds so far. I know that it's a small gain this entire pregnancy but it's still hard to see the scale climb.

Maternity clothes: I'm not sure that there's anything to update in this category. I'm getting bored with what I've got but I'm not willing to go out and buy more right now.


Movement: I love it when Bubba moves! And lately it's been stronger, I had my arm on top my belly yesterday and then all the sudden Bubba kicked it hard!

Sleep: What happened to my beauty sleep?! I'm up an average of 4-6 times a night to pee and turn over. This usually results in me being exhausted :(

Cravings: lots of fruit cravings, salty chips, chocolate. I'm trying to lower my wheat and gluten intake cause the heartburn is crazy and Zantac is working still but not all the time anymore :(

Symptoms: well... if you read my last post then you know my butt hurts. A LOT! Which has become a progressively annoying problem that I'm not very happy with. Oh well, at least in 14 weeks I'll have relief :) But other than that things are going well. Still having heartburn, still having troubles with #2, starting to see the beginnings of a single stretch mark (AHH!), still having baby brain moments and my hair is awesome! No recent nose bleeds, YAY!

Best moment of the week: ummm, for the first time I'm actually straining to think of one. I will say that my gestational diabetes test was... SO great (no actually not at all). But my mom came because Cam was in school and she stayed with me and I had such a great time with her and then she took me out for lunch! Yum! So that was fabulous!


Oh and if you have it in you to tell a pregnant woman that she's HUGE! Please refrain. A mom at work today told me that I'm SO big for 6 1/2 months pregnant. She said this aloud several times and then insisted my baby is a girl. THANKS! Wasn't that the exact thing I needed to hear today after the scale almost made me cry and my butt has been a constant source of agony for days.

Where's my chocolate?! :)
N.

why yes, that does ache... Thank-you!

Honestly, someone should have told me about the aches and pains that come along with pregnancy. Like for instance, my butt! Oh my goodness gracious my butt has never hurt so much in my entire life! Yes, I'm not joking, my right butt cheek aches. My hips are sore, my legs... it's as though I just did hours of a work out or ran a marathon!
I am aware of the fact that I was in horrible shape fitness wise before I got pregnant... but still!

Anyone have any ideas to help the aches?

And WHAT happened to my beauty sleep?! It's like I got to be 25 weeks pregnant and POOF sleep became difficult. I got a pregnancy pillow, it sort of helps but not really.

Gosh Bubba, momma just wants a good nights sleep and her butt to stop hurting. Can you do that for me sweetie? Yah... didn't think so.

*sigh*
N.

Stuff!

You know, I knew that there would be stuff out there for babies but the amount of crap to purchase is incredibly ridiculously overwhelming at times. I decided that in order to diminish the crazy stress, I'd tackle one necessary item at a time.

Thankfully we're not the first ones to have a child out of all the friend circles we have. I've been given bottles, books, nursing pillows, and gifts of clothes, blankets, etc. We've bought a bumbo, stroller, crib, and car seat all used from trusted friends (crib was a garage sale find). My sister is gracious enough to send me maternity clothes, a few cloth diapers and thankfully a breast pump (I'd only accept a used breast pump from her).

So phew! We've got a few things covered. I'm getting cloth diapers from Tender Tushies, after MUCH research and exploration on the topic. I'm thrilled, and YES! I'm cloth diapering. YES! I'm going to be successful at it and nope I'm not afraid of my child's poop. I work in Early Childhood education for goodness sake.

So next on the long list??
- infant/toddler carrier
- rocking/gliding chair
- area rug for Bubba's room
- storage for the cloth diapers
- new light for Bubba's room
- curtains
- some type of art for Bubba's room
- swaddler type clothing like contraption
- receiving blankets
- avent bottles (that's the pump I'm getting)
- burp cloths
- round hospital type pacifiers
- clothes!

I'm missing A LOT I'm sure!! But you know what? I need stuff too.
- nursing bra(s)
- a hair cut
- nursing shirts/tanks
- hip band thingy
- probably bigger shoes by the time I have Bubba
- sports bra and clothing for laboring in the hospital

It never stops and I'm sure it never will. Oh well, I can't wait to meet you little one who's making me pee constantly and causing my right butt cheek to hurt when I sit. I absolutely and desperately love you and can't wait to meet you!!

N.

25 weeks pregnant!

How far along: 25 weeks!

Size of baby: eggplant (9 inches & 1.7 pounds)

Weight gain/loss: I gained 2 pounds again this week. That puts me at a gain of 11lbs so far. Considering the fact that Bubba's supposed to be doubling in size, I can handle it :)

Maternity clothes: I'm not sure that there's anything to update in this category. I'm getting bored with what I've got but I'm not willing to go out and buy more right now.

Movement: CAM FELT THE BABY! Two separate times this week and he smiles so big everytime!

Sleep: I counted six times that I woke up the other night cause I had to pee. So that's not fun.

Cravings: I suddenly want to eat constantly, like everything I see that looks good (like those caramel chocolates in front of me here at work). I'm still calorie counting and decided that I'm going to treat my labour like the marathon it is and exercise daily to prepare for it.

Symptoms: honestly, not much this week. Same old same old. Just feeling bigger and slower and I make sure my magic Zantac is taken twice a day like instructed :)

Best moment of the week: when Cam finally felt Bubba move. I was so excited for him, I think it helped him feel more connected to the baby. I can't wait for when the movements are more visible and Cam can see it.


Well, only 15 weeks until my expected delivery date but you never know. Bubs will come when he/she chooses, could be sooner than later :)

My gestational diabetes test is this Saturday morning. Wish me luck! It's the 2 hour test, yikes!

Happy Wednesday!
N.

oh baby names!

I realized once I got pregnant that picking out a name would be one of the hardest parts of preparing for a baby. Other parts of the process I was surprisingly quick to come to terms with. It's going to hurt, I'm going to get BIG, I'm probably going to get every symptom in the book. Okay, I can deal with that. But wait a moment, I have to choose a name for this baby that will grow into a person and it has to carry the name I choose for the rest of its life!? WHOA! That's a lot of pressure! Can't bubba just arrive with a birth certificate indicating the already given name like my cabbage patch kids did when I was young? God, can you please just whisper the name YOU have chosen for this baby so I don't have to choose?

FYI: cam chose the nickname bubba, cause even the nickname was too much for me.

I can name the fish we buy and the car we drive, but a baby?! When I close my eyes and picture what I believe a son of mine would look like I'm not sure which name would fit. A tough manly name? A short preppy name? A long traditional name? Will he be loud? Quiet? Outgoing? Timid? All those qualities I think affect what name would be best suited for him. And the name MUST mean something important, not anything like "crooked nose" (haha, the meaning for the name Cameron). And then when I stop to picture my daughter, I see bright blue eyes and wavy long blonde hair. Will she be a tomboy? Or a princess? Talkative or observant? Stubborn or relaxed? Is she deserving of a beautifully elegant name or would a cute spunky name be better suited for her? And again, it must mean something or reflect something important. Now insert giant ass monster baby name book:


You'd think after hours with this book and two long lists of preferred names that I'd have some clue. Nope, not really. I'm not sure I'll be ready to commit to any sure name for bubba until he/she comes and I look into his/her eyes and just know, I have a feeling that it'll be so obvious.

Yah, I know that it's going to be okay. And I guess if we just can't decide then using the name Bubba would be a good back up plan right?! ;)
N.

24 weeks pregnant!

How far along: 24 weeks! That's SIX months!

Size of baby: ear of corn (8.5 inches & 1.5 pounds)

Weight gain/loss: the Christmas season finally caught up to me, I gained 2 pounds this week. That puts me at a gain of 9.4lbs so far.

Maternity clothes: I'm not sure that there's anything to update in this category. I'm getting bored with what I've got but I'm not willing to go out and buy more right now.

Movement: I'm feeling a lot of movement, it feels great! Makes me happy that baby is alive and well. Cams still trying to feel the movements with no luck yet.

Sleep: I've been on vacation so my sleeping patterns have been off. I tried going back to my regular sleeping routine last night and ended up with only five interrupted hours of sleep. I'm getting up quite a bit more to pee at night, it's getting annoying.

Cravings: ummmm, just sweets like usual. I missed champagne at New Years but that's okay. I'd LOVE a good cheeseburger, that'd be good right about now.

Symptoms: the usual: nose bleeds, light headed more often (which usually means more blood & a bigger belly), heartburn, sore hips and crazy constipation. But I'm dealing with it all with minor complaining :)

Best moment of the week: I had a great New Year's Eve at my besties place with her husband, my husband, my brother & another good friend. They drank (I had bubbly juice), we ate (I learnt I can't eat lots anymore) and we played clue (my character was the killer, go figure!). It was good times!


I also wanted to say a huge THANK-YOU! To all of my incredible, wonderful, amazing friends who are messaging me, texting me, telling me that I look beautiful and I'm glowing. You make me smile every. single. time! So big a *hugs* to you :)
N.

A look back at 2012 and a look ahead at 2013!

Is 2012 really over? I can't believe that it is already 2013, last night we couldn't believe we were right back at the Tetz house ringing in another new year, AGAIN! Yikes!


The year 2012 went by really fast, so lets take a look at what happened and our plans for 2013.

Career Decisions:

2012
* I finished working my first year in a preschool (June). I also made the decision to move to a newly opened daycare (September). I tried to complete my ECE certificate but just couldn't handle my pregnancy, full time work in a new centre with a new role and school so I dropped my course and changed my shift at work.
* Cam made the decision and commitment to pursue a career in horticulture instead of youth pastoring. This was not an obvious decision for him to make since it involved more schooling. He started university in September and has been incredibly successful, more so than he was in bible college.

2013
* I will go on maternity leave somewhere between march 1st and march 15th. This is my choice, my work is not pushing me in any direction. I recognize now how much harder it's getting to be productive and move around, it's only going to get worse. And the time I have before Bubba comes, I'll never have again!!! So I'm going to take advantage of it. We have no set plans as to what I'll do in 2014 when my leave is over.
* Cams work is supposed to be "seasonal" but it sure hasn't felt that way for him lately. He'll be back to it January 3rd and back in university for one class this winter semester. We're not sure what his fall 2013 semester will look like, but this spring/summer work wise is looking to be nice and busy!

Family:

2012
* in the early days of August I went with my brother to a work out session and just about died. I committed to loosing some weight before trying to get pregnant. Yah, little did I know little Bubba had other plans. I took a pregnancy test and SURPRISE! Pregnant. I was freaked and thrilled, putting the work out/loosing weight commitment on hold ten months.

2013
* Bubba is due to arrive late April, so far everything is healthy, good and on track! A "perfect" pregnancy. I've only gained 7.2lbs so far, I see this as a huge accomplishment. I've asked my friend Kortney to be my dula, we're talking labour and delivery more these days and I'm reading a lot more on parenting. We've also been accumulating baby supplies, our newest addition being a teal bumbo I bought off a friend. The only brand new baby thing we've bought is a diaper bag, everything else is used and I believe that we're smart for buying this way. We've saved an estimated $250 on our stroller alone!

Church:

2012
* we started attending a life group at our church and we love it! It's such a great way to get connected into community. We only missed one study cause of Cams finals at school.

2013
* we have no plans to stop attending even after Bubba comes. We've been told that baby is more than welcome, so there will be many arms for babe to sleep in on Monday evenings! I also hope to attend women's ministry events once I have more time on maternity (ha! More time).

Now I know that this post is getting long but... Oh well.

I do have some personal goals for 2013, but most have to do with my pregnancy, labour, delivery and parenting. These all deserve their own posts but I'll touch briefly on them here.
* I want to eat VERY well these next four months. I haven't been awful but I can do better
* I should be more active, my hips hurt a lot these days so I believe if I exercise more then that will help it
* I want to have the most natural labour I can. I recognize that there is a time and place for medical intervention but if I can help it, I want all natural. Kortney and I are talking, don't you worry
* after Bubba arrives, I want to kick major baby weight butt!!! After my recovery I want to do what's best for my body and my future pregnancies. So loose the baby weight and get to my goal weight. I'm giving myself a year to do it.
* breast feed exclusively for a minimum of 6 months (I want to BF for a full year) and practice baby led weaning.
* I especially want to parent intuitively and hands on, listen to myself and my own beliefs before others. Do what I believe is best for my baby and hold onto the truth that I can do it! And I know my baby best.

That's all I guess, if you made it this far then thanks for reading. And Happy New Year! I wish your 2013 to be all you hope it will be.

Blessings,
N.

What if?...

What if Bubba really is a boy? And the first child I have isn't a girl. What if I never have a girl? Even after the three children we're planning to have (God willing of course). What if I never get to experience the close mother-daughter relationship I have with my mom but with a daughter of my own? What if my future is filled with toy cars, dirt, robots, wrestling and endless sport activities?

I'm just going to be real here with you for a second. I want a daughter, plain and simple. That doesn't mean that I want ALL my children to be girls but it does mean I pray someday for a girl. But you know what else? I want a son too. I yearn for the day my little boy looks up at me with the big blue eyes he got from his daddy. My heart aches for moments of cuddling my little guy to sleep and dressing him up in cute ties and suspenders.

So what am I getting at here? Well, I hope my future has nothing but healthy children in store. But if I am able to have any say in the genders I am blessed with, I would ask for at least one of both. I'm just being honest.

Why you may ask? Because I am so desperately scared of missing out on something. If Bubba is a boy then I'm terrified of having only boys in my future. What if I never have a daughter? If Bubba is a girl, then by golly will I only have girls? I don't know if I can handle three or four mini Nicole's.

Will my life be any less fulfilled if I only have girls or only boys? Absolutely not! I just continue to remind myself of this truth and ignore the fear and the lies my mind gets overwhelmed with. I'm having a child, a beautiful, precious, little one that I'll love more than life. It does not make a difference if that child is a girl or boy. It does not change the way I feel about my baby.

I'm just being honest here, was/is anyone else feeling the same way?

Blessings,
N.

23 weeks pregnant! Happy Boxing Day!

Happy Boxing Day!!!!!


How far along: 23 weeks! picture taken at 22 weeks & 5 days (Christmas Eve), I didn't want to bother with taking another one.

Size of baby: Papaya (8 inches & 1.2 pounds)

Weight gain/loss: I really wasn't going to weigh in this morning. I thought there was no way it was going to be good. But then I thought I can't change my routine just because I'm scared of what the scale might say. So after all the Christmas festivities these past few days and all the over eating. I've only gained 0.8 lbs in two weeks (last week I didn't gain a thing!). Wow! How many more calories am I burning each day because of this baby?? It must be tons!!

Maternity clothes: I wore my Christmas sweater (pictured above) on Christmas and Christmas Eve and I loved it! So cozy. My mom drew my name for our Kroeker gift exchange and she got me a maternity shirt and a pair of maternity underwear. Cam got me men's sweat pants for Christmas too and they are wonderful! It's so nice to have sweats that fit right around my tummy. I also found a few shirts the other day in my closet that my sister Jessica sent me that I forgot I had. I've been getting so many compliments on those too! I love how these clothes are helping to make me feel so good about myself.

Movement: I was reading that soon the kicks will be felt from the outside. I can't wait to grab Cams hand and have him feel his baby! It'll be such a special moment. I'm still feeling a lot of movement, especially after I eat. I think Bubba's been enjoying the Christmas food and goodies as much as I have.

Sleep: once again, no complaints. My sleep is amazing and I'm not having any troubles at all. I'm expecting that to change but I'm enjoying it right now. No need for a tummy pillow either.

Cravings: nothing really, I got my McDonald's fix last week. That was mostly it, I could go for a Starbucks Christmas coffee and treat about now but that's all.

Symptoms: I'm getting annoyed at the sudden nose bleeds, three in one week. But if I keep up my Metamucil and Zantac routines then I feel fantastic! No stretch marks so far but I have been putting on a lot of lotion these days. I'am getting sore hips more frequently when I walk too long, like around the mall for hours helping my husband buy Christmas presents!

Best moment of the week: it's got to be Christmas and all the things involved with the holiday. Today we're doing a big breakfast with my family and then over to mom & dad Stehr's place. I'm excited to see them! Then I get to relax and I'll be back to work for January 3rd. Next prenatal is January 2nd and I'm hoping to get my gestational diabetes test done that day too.

Happy Boxing Day to all :)
N.

Merry Christmas!

From our family to yours, we wish you a very Merry Christmas! We hope that your day of celebration is merry and bright, filled with love and hope. We are beyond thankful for all that we have and what is on it's way!

Today we took a nice long walk in Campbell Valley park to feed the birds. It was cold and wet but so much fun!






Then we came home to relax and went out to our Christmas Eve service at our home church. It was a fantastic service, brought me to tears a few times. Now we are at home celebrating, we finished dinner and are waiting for my brothers to get back from their church service. We'll open one gift, eat more and drink (juice for me!). Then it's the annual watching of the movie Christmas vacation. SO funny!!!

But what's a blog post without a belly shot? So here you go, 22 weeks & 5 days.


Bubba & I wish you MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!! I'm inflated from Christmas turkey :)

N.

looking at Mary differently this Christmas

I feel like I'm looking at Christmas much differently this year. Songs on the radio to do with Mary bring me to tears as Bubba kicks inside me. Today on our weekly trip to superstore for groceries I caught myself realizing that these songs are different to me now because I AM a MOTHER! This little one inside me is growing strong, kicking away, getting ready to be born and be in my arms. I can actually relate to Mary this Christmas, I actually understand what it feels like to have a child grow in my body. Because it's happening TO ME right now!

But Mary birthed a child who would one day die a death that was prophesied on a cross that would save humanity. Obviously that won't be Bubba's fate. But she was probably nervous too about labour, birth, raising a child, breast feeding. She probably wondered about so many things. The difference is her baby was destined to die, I don't know how she could have had that faith. To me, Mary has become more than just the mother of Jesus but also an extraordinary woman of God. I have a husband, I'm 27 years old with a home, job and money in the bank. I'm going to deliver Bubba in a hospital with doctors, nurses and drugs! She was unmarried, poor, and SO young. Many believe she was around 13 years of age, delivering her child in a filthy stable with animals surrounding her, NOT doctors. She could have been killed! Yet she faithfully had her son, believing that God would protect them and provide.

So thank-you mother of Jesus for being so strong and giving birth to the reason we celebrate Christmas. I'll be here shedding my tears for you to all the songs until they stop and the new year begins. And you know, I'm okay with that!! 😊


Baby grew again!

Merry Christmas to all!
N.

four years of love!

Today marks four incredible years of being mr. & mrs. and we couldn't be happier!! Cam and I definitely had a rough start in our dating years, I walked into the student lounge of CBC assuming I'd find friendship and Christian fellowship. Which I did! But I also found the love of my life sipping away on a matte cup and drawing quietly in the corner. It took less than a month before we were dating and my young twenty year old self was flying high on love and dreams.

Here we are, four years of marriage and I'm 22 weeks pregnant. We've worked HARD to make our marriage work and to love one another unconditionally and selflessly. I can't wait for another year with my husband, to have this baby and watch him transform into a daddy. I can't wait to see our marriage grow and change after our child is born!

Cameron Lyle I love you with all of my heart and soul. I thank God everyday for you and appreciate who you are in my life. Till death do us part! *MUAH!*


N.

22 weeks pregnant!!

How far along: 22 weeks!!

Size of baby: Spaghetti squash (8 inches & 1 pound)

Weight gain/loss: I'm exactly the same as last week. This means a weight gain of 6.4 pounds total so far! I'm still quite proud of myself!

Maternity clothes: Nothing new to share here. I better stay away from stores right now, it's too fun to get new stuff!

Movement: It's incredible to me the amount of movement I feel on a regular basis. I got Cam to put his hand on my tummy last night just hoping he'd feel Bubba even just a little bit. He didn't, it makes me eager for the day when he can. Maybe for Christmas?

Sleep: amazing! Love sleep! No complaints still, just up a lot to pee.

Cravings: I still want chocolate all the time! Now I want more carbs, still in the carrots and ranch dip phase. I've been asking for McDonald's lately but I doubt I'll get it anytime soon.

Symptoms: thank goodness for Zantac & Metamucil! They save me everyday from a horrible grumpy state of misery. I discovered last night after I blew my nose that a bleeding nose isn't a pregnancy myth. Leg cramps in the middle of the night SUCK! And I was seriously light headed yesterday. But I always say, it could be worse!! Who knows how I'll be with #2 (yes I'm already thinking that far ahead! I'm just like that).

Best moment of the week: hands down my ultrasound was the very best moment of the week! I didn't cry but I had the biggest smirk on my face the entire time. I was just in awe and amazement, SO happy the entire time. We don't know the gender but Leigh-Ann does, makes me wonder what it was she may or may not have seen.

Until next week...

MERRY CHRISTMAS! have a wonderful time with family & friends. We're very excited for this Christmas, the last one as just us two.

Blessings,
N.

meet my precious baby Bubba!

Today was just one of those extraordinary days that you never forget. I got to meet my baby via ultrasound and (s)he is gorgeous, but of course I'm biased. To see Bubba on that screen moving around was so surreal. There were a few times when I caught myself thinking "that's YOUR baby! It's in YOUR body!" Wow!

We are fortunate enough to have a friend who does ultrasounds so she made the experience extra special. Thank you SO MUCH Leigh-Ann! If you're reading this, I can not even express how incredibly grateful we are. You'll be seeing us as long as you're available with all our little Bubbas.

I bet you're wondering about the details? Okay here they are:
* Bubba is measuring 22 weeks in a few measurements (I'm dated at 21 weeks and 1 day today) if this means an earlier delivery then we could have a baby on Cam's 32nd birthday or my brother Jason's 26th birthday
* Bubba's heartbeat was at 139, but Leigh-Ann reassured me that this does NOT indicate the gender
* Bubba's legs measure in the 90th percentile, we're going to have a long baby!!
* All is healthy and developing normally. We are very happy and thankful for this for sure!
* we do not know the gender, only Leigh-Ann knows and I doubt she'll tell you if you ask her!



There (s)he is! I'm so in love with my Bubba, boy or girl, it doesn't matter to me. I can't wait to meet my precious child.

N.

21 weeks pregnant!!!

How far along: 21 weeks! WOW this pregnancy is going by fast.

Size of baby: Banana (7 inches & 11 ounces)

Weight gain/loss: I just about freaked on the scale this morning, up 3 pounds. So that's a total of 6.4 pounds gained so far. But I'm thinking I know what the culprit is (other than baby). My doctor said I don't have to gain anything but if I do then to aim for 10-15 pounds. This will put me back to my pre-pregnancy weight basically right after Bubba is born. Then I'll get my ass handed to me by Anna the rock star personal trainer friend I have lined up for the summer!!

Maternity clothes: I found the softest red sweater from Old Navy for Christmas! SO happy!

Movement: loving it right now, the kicks are all over. It's now more of a reality that this is happening since I feel Bubba frequently now. I'm feeling SO much more connected to the baby, I love that it's so obvious to the world (and to myself) that I'm carrying my first born child.

Sleep: I have no complaints, just up a lot to pee.

Cravings: the absolute overwhelming desire for chocolate is well, overwhelming! One of my weight gain culprits I'm sure. I'm also on a huge carrots and ranch dip kick... Mmmmm.... Veggies and dip!

Symptoms: I am not exaggerating when I say PRAISE THE LORD for Zantac! It's saved me from heartburn hell. I am SO grateful that my doctor gave me a prescription for it. HURRAY!

And then there's the horrible bathroom trouble I've been experiencing. Sorry folks but I'm going to talk about poop for a second and my inability in this department. I had what my doctor diagnosed as "terminal constipation" before my Endometriosis surgery in 2008. I suffered every 6-8 weeks with what I called an attack back then. After surgery I've only dealt with a few attacks but now since my second trimester started I've been anticipating one and well... TA DAAAAA!!!!! Sunday night I had that ever so familiar pain. So I got the "poop stuff" my mom so eloquently calls it (restoralax) and I'm waiting for relief. I'm still on my prune juice and Metamucil regime. I'm almost doing cardio every day to help... If ANY body has a tip for me to try then by all means tell me!!! Don't be shy!!!

Best moment of the week: it's got to be all the extra movement I've been experiencing and the closeness I feel to Bubba because of it.

Happy Wednesday once again!! No dinner with my folks tonight, they're busy (sad face). But tomorrow we're going for our 21 week ultrasound... I can't even express how crazy excited I am for this!!!!

N.



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20 weeks pregnant!

How far along: 20 weeks! Half way until I get to meet my baby.

Size of baby: Mango (6.5 inches & 10 ounces)

Weight gain/loss: I lost a pound this week which puts me at a gain of 3.4lbs so far this pregnancy!!

Maternity clothes: I was getting SO frustrated this week, I was at Old Navy in Langley but no maternity clothes. Then ended up at both H&M and Old Navy in Metrotown Saturday and AGAIN no maternity sections. So tomorrow after my prenatal appointment I'll finally go to Guildford and try to find something for Christmas.

Movement: I thought that I felt a true kick last night a couple times in a row but I'm not sure. I definitely expected that Bubba's movements would be stronger now but I keep forgetting that he/she is sleeping most of the day.

Sleep: I have a sore throat and stuffed nose right now so sleep isn't that great. But I honestly can't complain it could be MUCH worse.

Cravings: chocolate everything! I just want chocolate. I'm also craving veggies with ranch dip, I had some at Cams work party Sunday and I couldn't stop. SO good! And I had to have an egg salad sandwich yesterday which was weird cause I haven't had egg in a while.

Symptoms: I found the perfect combination of Metamucil (2 tbsp) followed by a huge glass of water, three times a day. Then a small glass of prune juice once a day. It's wonderful to have that working for me finally. Other than that I continue to breathe fire (heartburn) on a regular basis.

Best moment of the week: two moms here at work found out about my pregnancy by asking my co-worker about me cause they were too shy to ask me! One of our regular subs brought her daughter over last week and we met. Afterwards her daughter apparently told her mom that I look like a teenager and I'm WAY too young to have a baby! Hahaha... am I really that young looking? I also had some fantastic conversation with Cams boss on Sunday night at the staff Christmas party. Everyone kept asking me how I'm feeling, I was the only completely sober one, that was fun!!

Well... Happy Wednesday! Take care for now :) it's starting to look very Christmasy at our house, it makes me super happy!

N.

19 weeks pregnant!!

How far along: 19 weeks! (WOW! I'm basically half way already)

Size of baby: Mango (6 inches & 0.5 pounds)

Weight gain/loss: I realised that I never updated last week, but I've gained 4.4lbs the last two weeks in total. I can't believe I'm sharing that with the public! I'm honestly a little nervous by that number only because I know I'm only supposed to gain like 15lbs altogether but I'm wondering if there are different factors that have contributed to my weight gain (other than the obvious baby), so I'm going to make some changes that try that instead (like eating less fruit & carbs which are basically just sugar and instead eat more veggies & protein, which I'm seriously lacking in).

Maternity clothes: No Christmas outfit yet :'( But I'm hoping to get to the stores soon.

Movement:Yes! Lots of movement, definitely getting more pronounced like I know that it's Bubba kicking rather than my stomach growling. I'm waiting for those intense kicks so that Cam can feel baby too. But I always announce to him when Bubba's awake and moving, he likes to know his baby is active.

Sleep: It's starting to get bad but then again it can always get worse than it is now. I'm
waking up a lot and it takes more effort to move from side to side (I just naturally sleep on my side) but that's okay. I'm sure that I'll be missing even this kind of sleep come spring.

Cravings: I miss wine, it's just one of those things you miss when you're not allowed it anymore. And I definitely miss my spicy tuna roll, but I realised I can put spicy sauce on pregnancy approved sushi rolls so that's making me a bit happier.

Symptoms: Cam says that I'm having a "textbook pregnancy" whatever that means cause I'm sure he hasn't read any literature on pregnancy yet. Which suprises me since he's such a book worm. But currently it's just the struggle to be drinking water, I'll get really thristy and normally would chug a litre of water no problem but now I immediately get sickly after too much water at once. I am also currently on a Metamucil routine (which we all know what that's for) and I'm starting gluten-free as well because I believe it's causing me a lot of discomfort.

Best moment of the week: On Monday at bible study we were singing some songs and as soon as we started singing Bubba started to move around A LOT! It made me so happy because Cam was sitting right next to me and I think that's the first time it heard Cam sing. I didn't want to sing at all, I just wanted to sit back and enjoy my baby enjoying the sound of it's fathers voice.

That's it for now... almost time for me to get back to work. My momma is making me dinner again tonight (it's our Wednesday tradition) and we're helping decorate their Christmas tree! I'm SO excited I can hardly contain myself.
N.

Baby weight

Before I got pregnant I had the realization that my health was not where I wanted it to be. And I was quickly walking down the road of morbid obesity. Before I peed on that preggo stick I committed myself to waiting on the baby thing and whip my ass into shape. My baby deserved an incredible environment to grow. Yet, the plan sorta changed when the pregnancy test screamed positive. Now what was I
supposed to do?

I honestly had a flow of different emotions, disappointment that my Bubba would grow in this obese body and fear that the weight I would gain would be impossible to loose after the delivery. Visions of my diabetic, obese and sick Oma flooded my mind. Don't get me wrong, I was incredibly happy to be pregnant and happy to know that I am indeed fertile but was it the right timing?

I truly believe that God has His hand in every part of my life and this wasn't going to be any different. I prayed every day on my way to work last year for a baby, I'm not even exaggerating EVERY day I prayed. So God answered, obviously He didn't see my weight as an issue. I keep reminding myself of this fact. So far the scale has only moved up 2 pounds. I'm 18 weeks, so 2 pounds I think is a huge accomplishment!! Especially since Bubba could now be weighing in at approximately half a pound.

I am finding it interesting to look in the mirror and see my waist rapidly disappear. And a bigger and bigger baby belly appear. I swear I am going to be a house!! A huge, pregnant, monster of a house. And then I think, oh gosh! The stretch marks, the loose skin after I give birth, the saggy boobs, will my body EVER be healthy? Will I EVER get back into those size eight jeans I once wore when I first met Cam? I'm just trying to be honest here.

I'm also struggling with how I'm eating now. I've struggled with whether I should commit to being gluten free and dairy free for a very long time. I keep going back to how great I feel when I stick to it, yet I never seem to be able stay on it long-term. I'm concerned with how it's affecting my pregnancy and Bubba. I'm concerned that the food I'm eating right now is affecting Bubba's development and that if Bubba will be negatively affected if I do suddenly go gluten free now (today).

A lot goes through my mind these days.

Happy Saturday
N.

18 weeks pregnant!

How far along: 18 weeks!

Size of baby: sweet potato (5.5 inches & 5 ounces)

Weight gain/loss: I'm weighing in on Thursday mornings now, so I'll update this tomorrow.

Maternity clothes: going to Black Friday this week, I want to get a Christmas outfit.

Movement: just discovered yesterday that after I'm done exercising Bubba moves around A LOT! Another motivation for me to get moving.

Sleep: I'm having a harder time turning around at night now. I'm still waking up a lot for the bathroom, o well!

Cravings: so I totally caved in and had Burger King last Thursday. But as for cravings recently, not really.

Symptoms: well, just the usual. I know that if I eat food that's not so great then I get heartburn. If I don't drink enough water then I get a headache. So really, I don't have much to complain about.

Best moment of the week: feeling all the movements last night. But Sunday (not the best moment but...) I woke up with a headache and immediately drank water thinking it would help. Instead I threw up so violently that I burst blood vessels in my face and down my neck. Lucky me! Haha, I'm going to look SO FABULOUS after I deliver Bubba I'm sure, with my face all spotted. Oh well, that's okay I'll have a beautiful baby to cuddle.

Happy Wednesday!

N.

17 weeks!

It's Wednesday again! Therefore, another baby Bubba update. Enjoy!!


How far along: 17 weeks

Size of baby: turnip (5 inches & 5 ounces)

Weight gain/loss: I'm weighing in on Thursday mornings now, so I'll update this tomorrow. I'm a little nervous, I had a BAD long weekend with going over calories.

I weighed in, down another 0.2 pounds which means I've basically gained nothing so far this pregnancy.

Maternity clothes: I haven't bought anything new... Just enjoying mixing things up.

Movement: I definitely felt something last night while lying down and watching tv. It was a very soft fluttering type sensation. I felt it again in the middle of the night and a little now that I'm sitting and relaxing for my lunch break.

Sleep: I'm waking up a lot more often at night and its taking me a bit longer to fall asleep but that's all.

Cravings: this week has been bad again for cravings but I'm just not giving in anymore. I want a whopper with cheese again from Burger King but I haven't indulged.... yet.

Symptoms: a little bit of heartburn again and my hips feel very loose these days. I'm trying to walk a lot more, that's when my hips get sore. And lots of burps... haha, I'm so gassy it's quite entertaining to Cam.

Best moment of the week: feeling what I'm sure was the baby last night. Although I was experiencing some gas, if it was just gas then I'll be SO disappointed :'(

Happy Wednesday! I'm a lucky girl, my momma is making me dinner tonight!

N.

16 weeks pregnant!!

It's Wednesday again! Therefore, another baby Bubba update. Enjoy!!

I'm going to do a picture every other week, so look for my 17 week photo next week :) okay, so I lied, here's my 16 weeks photo.


How far along: 16 weeks

Size of baby: Avocado (4-5 inches & 3-5 ounces)

Weight gain/loss: lost 2.6lbs this week which means that since finding out I'm pregnant I've gained 0.4lbs total.

Maternity clothes: I feel like my maternity wardrobe is better than what I had before I got pregnant! I'm LOVING getting dressed in the morning.

Movement: not yet :'( but I know that there's a chance it can happen soon and that makes me SO excited!!

Sleep: the time change over the weekend threw me off a bit. But otherwise, sleep is good! Dreams are getting weird though.

Cravings: ummmm, they've mostly gone. Other than wanting a spicy tuna roll and having chocolate Cheerios almost everyday. I'm doing great with my calorie counting, I think that's helping.

Symptoms: honestly, nothing to complain about. I finally understand why women love this trimester so much. My energy is back, heartburn basically gone, cramps are gone, things are good!

Best moment of the week: when I stepped on the scale yesterday and realized that I'm doing GREAT! It was the best feeling to know that this belly is all baby and my hard work is paying off :)

Happy Wednesday! I'm looking forward to a relaxing night tonight while my hubby is stuck doing homework (poor Camy).
N.

15 weeks exactly!! Happy Halloween!!

How far along: 15 weeks

Size of baby: I find this out tomorrow

Maternity clothes: the other day I picked up a pair of maternity jeans and black maternity pants, two tops and a super cute sweater. Then I got maternity underwear and I swear if you're preggo and not wearing these underwear then you're missing out!!!!!

Movement: not yet :( still the same old growing pains. But I'm sooooo looking forward to that first flutter.

Sleep: no problems here, thank goodness! I'm loving all the naps I get when I can get them.

Cravings: other than the fight with myself to stay out of the Halloween candy bowl, just Pho from Pho Rex has been on my mind. Oh, and Mi Mexico, ok maybe the need for fruit cups and orange juice still surfaces every so often.

Symptoms: heartburn like you wouldn't believe!!!! Thank goodness that I've kicked my ass into gear and will bust my butt to eat healthier. That should combat the horrible fire I'm getting daily, I feel like a dragon.

Best moment of the week: when the doctor on Monday said I can definitely keep working full time. That was a huge encouragement to me to get moving, track my eating and take care of myself and my little pumpkin.


Have a very safe and fun HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!
I'll be the momma cat with the round pumpkin belly at my parents front door with the candy bowl.
N.

staying full time!

So I went to the doctor yesterday and was cleared to work full time. I'm quite excited that everything is healthy and the symptoms I've been experiencing are just a normal part of pregnancy. The cramping was especially scary, but doc said that my tummy is just growing, that's all!! The doctor was funny cause she called my work "mommy work" which is a very appropriate description. We'll re-evaluate every prenatal appointment with whether or not I should continue to work but as of now, I'm full time!!!

One thing that came out of the appointment was my doctors very real concern about my weight. I know, I was FAR from where I wanted to be when I got pregnant. BUT I did work hard to loose like 20-25 lbs before I got pregnant. So basically I just need to get back to the healthy mentality I was in before my nausea changed things. I can do it, I feel very empowered to take care of me and Bubba! Plus... they weighed me after I drank a liter of water, ate a big meal and was wearing a whole bunch of clothing (geeez!) so I'm going with the number on my own scale.


Look!! I worked out today, so happy to get back on the bike. I can definitely keep this up.

After the YES to full time work I went to the mall with my mom to get maternity jeans (and celebrate!). Buying jeans that I feel great in and that fit and look great was such a fabulous idea!! I even got maternity underwear which is THE BEST!! I must buy more cause they're that fabulous.

Of course I asked my mom to come for support, to speak up when I forgot to mention something and to remember what the doctor says cause I often forget. But the really neat thing was that she got to hear Bubba's heartbeat. She was grinning ear to ear, talking about it afterwards. Bubba is her first grandbaby so to hear the heartbeat was really special to her, I'm so glad she got to be there for that.

Anyways, I've been the worst with the photo updates (sorry) so the next photo will be week 15. I'm definitely showing!!

Happy almost Halloween!! Cam is searching for my cat ears :)
N.

14 weeks & 2 days

I can't believe that it's already been another week! So here's the next update... Enjoy :)

(Picture to come)

How far along: 14 weeks & 2 days

Size of baby: large navel orange (4.5 inches)

Maternity clothes: most definitely, I'm still fitting into my "fat pants" from last year but that'll change quick. My sister sent me her stuff (thanks again Jess!!) so that's helped with some tops but I still need to find some jeans and tights. Any good tips?!

Movement: not exactly, but I occasionally it feels different in my lower abdomen. It's SOOO hard to explain and words have somehow disappeared from my vocabulary, but whatever feeling this is, it's reminding me there's a person in there somewhere.

Sleep: work has been challenging this week, so I've been sleeping about 11 hours a night these last few nights. It's been glorious!!!

Cravings: I want pizza really bad and orange juice, mostly just orange juice though.

Symptoms: the new thing is this headache I can't shake. I broke down and took Tylenol even though I really didn't want to.

Best moment of the week: when I came home yesterday from work to a clean house, thanks to Cam! Then my brother Jason took me out for dinner and treated me to a delicious feast (it wasn't pizza, but it was still gooood!).

That's it!!

N.

Boy or Girl??

It's definitely too early in my pregnancy to find out the gender. But even when we would be able to find out, Cam and I agreed that we want to be surprised at the birth.

What I find interesting is that this question is the first I'm asked from everyone and very frequently I get the "I can't believe you don't want to know" response. Usually I respond that it's the biggest surprise in life and so we will wait but honestly, YES OF COURSE I want to know!!! But patience is a virtue and Cam has an abundance of it.

So what's your guess? Mine? I think this babe is a boy. I've been looking at boys clothes, picking out boys names, thinking about boy stuff. It only occurred to me a week or so ago that this baby could be a girl!! Just because I think it's a boy doesn't mean it is a boy, remember we aren't finding out until I push the baby out. So someone's gotta call it's a boy but I very well could hear "it's a girl!!!".

So why am I so intent in thinking that the peach sized baby I'm carrying is a boy?? Now don't think I'm crazy or anything but around the first week of August I had this very vivid dream. Do you ever get dreams were its more reality than dream? Well, I do and when I do it's very very real. I had one of these dreams and in it I was in a hospital bed in a hospital gown and in labour pushing. Then all the sudden a screaming, beautiful, perfect baby boy was put on my chest and the dream was over. Then a week or so after this I had another vivid realistic dream that I was lying in bed with a very large baby belly, I could feel and touch my belly and it was hard. I didn't think much of these dreams until my cycle never came two weeks after the belly dream and then the pregnancy test said positive.

So does this mean I'm having a boy? I'm not sure, but I really wouldn't be surprised. I was definitely pregnant at the time I had both those dreams, I just didn't know it. How crazy is that?? But of course, there's a good chance this baby is a girl! We'll just have to wait another 26 or so weeks to find out!

N.

13 weeks pregnant!

So a friend of mine did this on her blog when she was pregnant with her second (ahem, kortney). So I decided once I hit my second trimester then I'd do the same and start taking weekly photos.

So here is post #1


How far along: 13 weeks!

Size of baby: peach (3 inches long)

Maternity clothes: yep! Black maternity pants, still can fit into my fat jeans from when I lost a bunch of weight before I got pregnant. A few pregnancy tops and will be receiving a box from my sister full of more stuff (YAY!).

Movement: nope, too early for that but I do feel a lot of stretching type sensations in my lower abdomen. A few minor cramps too when I bend over too much at work.

Sleep: looove sleep, I can't get enough sleep. I'm fast asleep by 10pm and take naps when I can get them. Now I'm finally having a harder time sleeping on my tummy.

Cravings: I just had to have a whopper with cheese no onions or pickles the other day! I caved and gave in, it was glorious!!

Symptoms: tired, a lot of the time I'm just tired. I'm trying to find motivation to get out walking again.

Best moment of the week: telling some of the kids at work that I have a baby in my belly! It's so surreal to say.

Now finally it's second trimester!! So happy to have reached this point. It's going by so fast. I'm loving it :)

N.

Priorities

Apparently I can't do it all, according to my husband I'm not superwoman, I'm super mom! So back in the spring as I was planning my life for the fall I never thought for once that I couldn't complete my goals. Even if I was to get pregnant.

I mean why wouldn't I be able to work full time daycare, go to night class and grow a baby in my uterus? I mean come on, I can do it all right? NOPE!

I'm so grateful for the fantastic company I work for. A company that loves children and believes in investing in their education. But also in their employees, enough to communicate concern. Especially if the one they're concerned about is pregnant, exhausted, stressed and could burn out sooner than later (ME!).

So after I shed tears, prayed, realized how I'm truly feeling and the reality of what's happening in my body, I made some serious changes. First, I dropped my ECE night class and praise GOD that they refunded me the full amount. Then I committed to trading shifts at work for the later shift which means more sleep. And now I'm in conversation at work about going down to part-time.

This means a lower maternity pay, but you know what? Money isn't everything and as Cam mentioned before, his baby and his wife's health mean much more than a few hundred dollars a month.

So yah, I'm not superwoman. I'm a 27 year old super mom growing a miracle and prioritizing the importance of that miracle. I love you Bubba, with every fiber of my being and I will do anything and everything for you!!

N.


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Tears of joy!

When we told my family about Bubba coming my mother burst into tears and couldn't stop! We decided to save our news for our Kroeker family Whistler trip. Cam was intent on getting cigars for the boys so I insisted on getting my mom a board book. On it I wrote: for my Omie, love your grand baby coming April 2013. When we got to whistler, after an incredibly horrible drive up for me which involved fish n' chips, nausea, brothers deodorant smell and very strong smelling mint gum. The front desk at the hotel invited us for a free drink and appies at a mixer and if you know my family we never say no to free food and booze. So we had to tell our secret sooner than planned cause if I wasn't drinking the free booze then there would be some raised eyebrows!
I came out of my bedroom with the book behind my back and announced that I had something to give mom. I handed her the book and she started to read it out loud. When she finally realized what it said she looked up and was like "wha?!" I then said "yes! I'm pregnant!" She then burst out in tears, dad had the biggest smile I've ever seen and my brothers were beyond words! Cam handed out the cigars (which they smoked our last night out there). I had to admit that Cam was right to save our news for the trip even though we knew weeks prior. Hardest secret to keep!!
Since then we've told friends personally and went public after our ultrasound. The amount of love and support has been incredible! We are so blessed by everyone who is sharing in our joy. My good friend Amy was in tears the other day telling me that my pregnancy is making her so happy! My mom has had friends crying when she shared the news! My auntie Lori was in tears when we told her and our good friend Dave made sure I knew how happy he was cause he knew the surgery, pain and uncertainty that came before this little one.
My brothers are even experiencing their own celebrations with people giving them overwhelming congrats! My best friend Nantina is showing off my ultrasound photo to people like a proud aunt should! My grandpa told me that it's about time!!! Hahaha... So THANK YOU! To everyone... every single one of you who have shed tears, given us hugs, came over with gifts (kailee!), said congratulations, made me dinner (twice, Alissa), and loved us through the journey to get here and will be there on the day of to help me get Bubba out (Kortney). YOU'RE the best!! And we love you!!!
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The moment we found out!

The moment my life changed was when I peed on that stick (pictured below) on a Saturday morning in August! It was incredibly emotional and shocking all at the same time. I did NOT expect to have gotten pregnant so quickly after we started trying in May. The gynecologists gave us the green light in April after I finished my MVP hospital program for my Vestibulodynia. We conceived the end of July!!! Good thing we were so diligent with our birth control before, who knew I was as fertile as my mom was at my age.

With all my hopes and dreams, tears and fears about motherhood. That moment the pee stick said positive was one of glee, excitement and crazy happiness. I'm going to be a mommy, I'm carrying a beautiful baby! I can not wait to feel it moving and kicking. But the first few weeks of this pregnancy was scary with intense cramps that got me worried. All is well though and baby is happy, healthy and growing strong! Keep growing sweet Bubba, mommy can't wait to meet you :)


Happy thanksgiving!!!!!
N.

exciting news to share!!!

I'M PREGNANT!!!! Yep, that's right. 9 weeks & 5 days along and we're so thrilled! We had a dating ultrasound yesterday morning and it was so fantastic to see our baby's fluttering heart. I just about cried, he/she may have looked like a peanut on screen but our little babe sure stole our hearts and got us a little teary eyed. I love baby Bubba with all my heart!! I can't wait for April 2013 😀





Our lives are never going to be the same, and I can't wait!!!

Blessings & excitement
N.

Daycare vs. Preschool

After my first full week of working daycare... it's official, I LOVE it! So much more than preschool even. I hope that I can continue most of my ECE career working W&T daycare rather than preschool. However, having Christmas, spring break and the summer off is something I'll definitely miss. O well, give and take right? If that's the only con then I can live with that.

Speaking of cons lets make a pros & cons list shall we?

Pros!

* daycare only has 25 children each day (some only come certain days) so I really have the opportunity to get to know each child. Rather than the 80 children that I would have total if I was in preschool.

* the ratio is awesome! 25 children for 5 teachers! Instead of 20 children for 2 teachers, the support from the other teachers is so helpful. You don't feel so stressed and overwhelmed with redirecting and reminding so many on your own. Chaos is much more controlled.

* I get a 15 minute break at 9:30am and then a hour break at 11:30-12:30pm. Such a great part of the day to sit back and relax. In preschool you let the morning class out at 11:30am and by the time the children are dismissed and all your parents have asked their questions and your door is closed, it's about 11:45am. Then you have to re-set the class and prep for the afternoon. By the time that's over and you get to eat, it's noon. Then it's chow time until 12:25pm when you need to quickly run to the bathroom to be ready to re-open at 12:30pm. Stressful? Yes!!!! Do you get to eat all your lunch? Not all the time.

* daycare has nap time and I get to be in there for the first 45 minute shift! All my kids sleep great!!!! So majority of the time I get to sit next to the sweetest kids and rub their backs and play with their hair until they start snoring away. Then I sit back and watch them sleep and pray quietly for each and every one of them. I don't get that in preschool.

* we get to play! All day long! When I get to work at 7:30am I walk into free play time. I play cars, play dough, puzzles, duplo, doll house, kitchen, the list goes on. We listen to children's music and after free play inside is over and after circle is done we do free play outside! So much time to play, I love watching them learn through play. Preschool has free play too but not nearly as much, their free play is shorter cause of the time crunch.


Cons!

* preschool is closed 2 weeks for Christmas, 2 weeks for spring break and 8 weeks for the summer. In daycare I get 10 days paid vacation that I get to take whenever I want. As well as 20 flex days (unpaid). It's really a great deal, but I like my Christmas off :)

That's my list!!! I'm so happy to be where I am, it's so much fun :)
N.

Whistler

This marks the end of my eight weeks off for summer, tomorrow I'm back at work! I'm nervously excited to get back into the classroom and get to know a whole new group of parents and children. I still absolutely love my job, it's just going to take a little while to get into the new routine. But that's okay.

This weekend we were at whistler and loved every moment. I love the beauty of British Columbia and I think whistler really speaks to that. I'm sad to be leaving today, but we'll be back again another time for sure!


Happy labour day!!!!

N.

Location:Blackcomb Way,Whistler,Canada

Blueberries

So I was at my good friend Alissa's house yesterday. When I got there she suggested going to the local farm to pick blueberries. Which doesn't sound like a big deal I know, but if you knew me then you'd know I despise picking berries. Cam LOVES picking berries, he did it as a child and we always get invited to go picking with his parents every summer. When he asks me to go he always bribes me with chocolate strawberries and Starbucks. But how could I say no to Alissa's darling 6 month old daughter and the idea of fresh blueberries? So I went, without a fuss and without a Starbucks.

When Cam found out that I willingly went picking he was jokingly confused and furious. He requested a homemade blueberry pie immediately and so I figured I'd give it a try. You know, I've never baked a pie before.


Just waiting to go into the oven


All done and waiting for Cam to get home from work. What do you think?

N.

pretty flowers

My husband really has a wonderful gift given by God to make landscapes gorgeous! And I am always excited when the flowers make their debut.





These are just a few I took pictures of today. There are many more ready to bloom in the next few days. And our vegetable garden is flourishing. We absolutely love our backyard oasis. The fish are even getting much bigger in their pond, hopefully I can get a close up picture of them soon.

I think tomorrow I'll be spending a lot of time outside :)
N.